"It´s been like...like something out of someone else´s life, these last few weeks with you"

Don´t leave me!

Kokonainen talvi pitäs taas jaksaa, ristus .____.

I love

Juhannus

Focus

I´m constantly balancing between believing and doubt. Some days I feel like everything is going to be ok and the next day I´m lost and scared and don´t have a clue.
And I should just
stop
worrying
so
much
.

Pondering

Sometimes everything seems so unsure and coincidental, and I just can´t decide if that´s conforting or terribly scary.

Arvaa mitä

"Prinsessan päiv ei men ninko tahtois menevä.
Kruunu takerttu koko ajan pyykkinaruihi
eikä ripustamisest tul mittä.
Hän soitta kolmannen kerra, vaik tiätä, ete vastat.
Assia ei ol mut see on kiireellist.

Hän sanosis:
Eerikki, arva mitä,
mu ikkunalaural o linnu varppa jälje lumes,
mää olen löytän hianon tiä meil,
ku tarttis hiuka appu taas,
osasin peril, kehu munt,
sain klasist haava, tul puhaltama
lämmitin talo ja puus huus hullu pulu,
kuljin kaisliko läpitte ja ajattelin meit.

On päivi ko mää tahron sunt kokonas
ja päivi ko mää tahron sunt kaikkines päivines
ja muit päivi on kans, ettet peljästy.

Eerikki hei, arva mitä,
ei mittä
ja kaik mitä ossan sanno."

- Heli Laaksonen


Ehkä olen onnellisempi kuin ikinä (jos ei lapsuuden huolettomuutta oteta huomioon).


(Kuva: google)

hiljaista

Voisko olla jo kesä?

Little doggie says "wuf!"

No tää on nyt kirjotettu ihan sillä varauksella JOS mä nyt satun ikinä pääseen naimisiin asti

Ni oikeesti mitä mä oon aatellu, ku oon miettiny et häävalssiks joko Juhiksen Vuodet vieriä saa, Stellan häävalssi tai Johanna Kurkelan Rakkauslaulu?
Ku siis tietenkin se on jompikumpi näistä:



TAI



Daa.

Tiekkö

You know. Someone I know is getting married today. I was photographing their wedding portraits and in a buss, on the way home it hit me. That feeling. That it may never be me.
I haven´t even dated anyone seriously. Ever. No one has loved me more than anyone else, and I haven´t loved anyone more than anyone else. I´ve been alone so long. So long that, I just realized, I have now gotten to a point where it´s actually really hard to even imagine anything else. I mean, I do daydream, sure, but it´s not same. I daydream, but I´m not really expecting anything to happen. You know. It´s hard to imagine that someone would love me more than anything, someone wanting to be with me like, FOREVER. Forever´s a long time baby. I do not know how it feels like, to love someone. I mean, I love my parents and my other relatives and my friends, but. To really love someone. I don´t know. It must be something really great. I must be huge.

But I don´t think anyone´s looking for me. I´ts like there´s this invisible wall between me and the rest of the world, the other people. You know. Like I can touch and feel and talk to people but I´m not really involved. I´m not really IN. Like I´m watching them from a distance. You know. Watching them fell in love and get married and having kids, but sort of like knowing at the same time I can never do the same. It FEELS like it, you know.
I think everyone else is seeing that wall too. Sensing it being there, at least. I mean, I have always felt like an outsider, since I was little. I´ve always been kind of...in the background. Even in the situations that you should feel yourself being a part of some group, like in a class when everyone is laughing at the same thing, you feel confortable and you look at someone in the eye and get this feeling of a sudden closeness. Even then, in the back of my head, I always feel like I somehow...wouldn´t supposed to be there. You know.

So, when I´m thinking my future, I can´t really see me with somebody. Somebody who would love me for ever.
You know?

Syvissä vesissä vaihteeksi

Kuva: PostSecret